Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
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