Heybabeimwearingurpanties
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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