Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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