I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize