Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
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