i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i need some magic done to my vagina
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize