so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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