...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
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Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
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drunk brunch me or lose me forever
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
I wear drunk well.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize