Texts From Last Night

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  (678): View more from Georgia

  I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.

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  (678): I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes. http://tfl.nu/k74c
  Replies (75) Good night (844) Bad night (15263) Order T-Shirt
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  (801): View more from Utah

  Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.

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  (801): Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room. http://tfl.nu/l3xg
  Replies (61) Good night (5156) Bad night (2180) Order T-Shirt
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  (319): View more from Iowa

  Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?

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  (319): Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's? http://tfl.nu/rb01
  Replies (18) Good night (828) Bad night (5014) Order T-Shirt
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.

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  (+44): The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps. http://tfl.nu/azhr
  Replies (14) Good night (6601) Bad night (1262) Order T-Shirt
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth

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  (405): I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth http://tfl.nu/n9x2
  Replies (9) Good night (760) Bad night (3698) Order T-Shirt
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...

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  (814): I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up... http://tfl.nu/nkqy
  Replies (13) Good night (2845) Bad night (2443) Order T-Shirt
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  (512): View more from Texas

  No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.

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  (512): No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies. http://tfl.nu/7qkv
  Replies (17) Good night (1898) Bad night (692) Order T-Shirt
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  (567): View more from Ohio

  I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.

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  (567): I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin. http://tfl.nu/b7wh
  Replies (6) Good night (861) Bad night (1546) Order T-Shirt
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  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me

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  (780): You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me http://tfl.nu/3d09
  Replies (6) Good night (1093) Bad night (533) Order T-Shirt
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  (507): View more from Minnesota

  We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.

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  (507): We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do. http://tfl.nu/66ti
  Replies (4) Good night (1199) Bad night (442) Order T-Shirt
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  (315): View more from New York

  If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".

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  (315): If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one". http://tfl.nu/zydx
  Replies (6) Good night (1699) Bad night (574)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.

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  (609): There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now. http://tfl.nu/la5k
  Replies (5) Good night (833) Bad night (563) Order T-Shirt
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.

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  (603): Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building. http://tfl.nu/icp2
  Replies (5) Good night (413) Bad night (545) Order T-Shirt
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.

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  (519): He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat. http://tfl.nu/pqit
  Replies (10) Good night (1201) Bad night (321)
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  (315): View more from New York

  My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.

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  (315): My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair. http://tfl.nu/70uu
  Replies (6) Good night (584) Bad night (227) Order T-Shirt

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