chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
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It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
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If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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