32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
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