About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Randomize