They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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