i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
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