i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Randomize