the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
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