soooo we both peed the bed last night...
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize