I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize