Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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