Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
as a side note pls kill me
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
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