There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
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