nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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