Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
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