No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize