Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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