I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
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