are you still at the devil's house?
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
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