You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
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I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
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i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
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