i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
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Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
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By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
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