He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
too bad you live with your parents still
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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