Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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