So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
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It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
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I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
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