No, you can still breathe under the balls.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Randomize