Ambien. No doubt about it.
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Randomize