I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
Randomize