this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
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