its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
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