haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
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