how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
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