You work out of a Hotel?
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
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