My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
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