apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize