Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I color on your dick again?
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
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