i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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