Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize