Do you still have your period?
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
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