He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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