wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
as a side note pls kill me
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
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