you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
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