Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize